Things are sort of looking up for us.

So this week a few things happened that will affect the family tremendously. First of which being, I finally got my family to listen to what I've been saying the last two months: My brother cannot continue living with us, in this much too crowded already home. It is stressing Nate and I both to the breaking point. We've argued more the past 3 months than we ever have throughout our entire marriage. He eats way too much, to the point it is cutting into the food that Nate, Trinity and I need to eat. It took Gramma calling my Granny, and then calling my Momma to tell her that I cannot continue caring for my brother as if he were my son. But they have finally listened. He has been gone since Tuesday, and it has given Nate, Trinity and me a MUCH needed downtime! My Momma, however, made me cry the night it was all laid on the table for her. I was accused of blindsiding her with this information, essentially. When, in fact, if SHE would have LISTENED to ME when I told her my feelings on the situation two months ago, SHE would have HEARD exactly what I supposedly blindsided her with this week. But that is the past now, I think she has come to terms with the fact that Bub was causing too much stress on my family, and I didn't want to play mother to him any longer. He is a big boy, 22 years old in fact, he can find a job and take care of himself, make his own choices, and hopefully he is smart enough that said choices will keep him out of trouble.
Second event this week that affects my family: Nate has been cut from 8 hours per week to 4 hours per week. That was the last straw for the both of us. I took it upon myself to call the Better Business Bureau, WV Labor Board, and the Area Director/Corporate Director of Bob Evan's about Nate and my situations. It turns out the Labor Board can't do anything about it, but I did receive a call back from the Area Director of Bob Evan's. Unfortunately, I received the call while we were not at home today, so I will have to call back tomorrow. I hope that the way the current GM is interpreting the labor/hiring/firing practice is looked into so that what has happened to Nate and myself will not happen to anyone else. No one should EVER have to deal with the stress that Bob Evan's has caused my family.
Third event: I also applied for Unemployment Compensation Benefits. And I have been qualified for $110.00 per week. So that is something that will help out immensely! I'm so excited that I finally stopped tucking my tail between my legs and went after the benefits! I was afraid if I tried to get them, they would take it out on Nate. But since they cut him down to 4 hours per week, what else could they have done to him, FIRE HIM?!? I think we'd be better off, honestly. Four hours per week isn't even enough to pay for the gas it takes to get back and forth from work!

So, even though this may just be meaningless to everyone else who might read our blog, this week has been a major week in our lives! I'm hoping that our troubles with Bob Evan's Unit 491 will be a stepping stone for the new employees of that company. I can only hope that the future and current employees will not be wrongly discharged or be pushed out the door by diminishing work hours!

This week has been a better week thus far. (Though the pain & mood swings are horrible.)I'm trying to learn to deal with everything life is throwing at my family in the best possible way, to look at it in the best possible light.I am unemployed, I look at this as a chance to spend more time with Trinity, and maybe work on my crafts more than ever. Trinity and I have even wrote down recipes for bath and body lotions, bubble bath, soap, bath beads, and bath soaks among many others! We're doing homemade gifts for Christmas again this year, so we'll be getting started on them by next month.Nate only works two days per week. That just means he gets to spend more time with us on a daily basis. However, this is one bad thing bout this- it is making him stir crazy and moody. But I know how he feels, so I am sympathetic.We do not have enough money, but it makes us appreciate everything we already have that much more. My brother is still living here, but he was gone for the night, and I was finally able to get him to listen to me when I asked for more privacy, now just to get him to clean up after himself. My mother is still acting odd, but she is my mother, and I will always love her, all I can do is hope that she will get through this odd phase with no lasting harm. Trinity is so excited about getting to do all the craft stuff from now until Christmas! She has been talking about it nonstop since I got the idea and she has taken over making the list of who is getting what homemade gift this year! I'm so proud of my little girl! I am also going to sell my bath and body products as well as my crafts, so if you know anyone that would like some handmade lotions, moisturizers, sugar scrubs, etc...let me know! Until later on, {{{good vibes}}} to all of you, and try to keep my family in your thoughts, as it can always help!

STRESSED

It has been a pretty rough month for our household. I'm not able to work at the moment, so we only have 1/2 the income we are used to. Nate is being walked all over at work, or that's how I see it. Every couple of weeks they are nice enough to give him a week off, unpaid. His checks are only approximately $30.00 to $50.00 per week. We're having a very hard time making ends meet. If it weren't for Gramma we would not be making ends meet now. It has been lovely getting to spend more time together as a family, but it is so taxing wondering if we are going to be able to make it the upcoming week. Thank goodness Trinity doesn't understand our situation enough to fret over it the way Nate and I are. I wish there was some way that we could stop worrying so much about the money issues. I fear that the stress is going to drive us apart. I do not want that! I've been stressing out more than I ever have in my life here recently. I have a severe case of cabin fever with no job to go to, so that ups my stress level even more. I'm also stressing out way too much over what might be wrong with me. I'm also stressing way to much over my brother staying with Nate and I. My daughter is sleeping with us, on a cot, or in her upstairs bedroom, because he has taken over her room down here. We have NO privacy. He has taken over Nate's x-box and our TV. He doesn't clean up his messes very often. He is supposed to be helping out with some household chores (i.e.: mowing the lawn, helping with the dishes, helping sweep and mop since I have a very hard time doing it, cleaning up after himself)but he hasn't done those in a long while. Nate gets so fed up, he just goes and does them himself, so he doesn't feel like smacking my brother for staying up all night on the x-box and then waking up and taking over the TV all day. He is making us stress out way too much! I guess, that's it for now. It does feel a little better getting some of these things off my chest, but now I fear that my brother will find this post and WWIII will break loose in my home. But maybe that is what will need to happen. I have tried to reason with him about his status here, about how it was only supposed to be a for a couple-few weeks and now it has been almost 3 months. He really doesn't have anywhere else to go, and he has no job, he is banking on getting SSI, but that is at least another 6 month wait- and I refuse to support him anymore. The only reason we've dealt with it this long is because the only way he will get to see his daughter is if he's here so Nate and I can help watch over her as well. My brother doesn't possess very good parenting skills. *sigh* So, while I love spending time with my niece, I am at my wits end trying to take care of her father because he would rather revert back to being a child rather than growing into the man he needs to be for himself , his daughter, and for my household's sanity.

A Much Needed Update

Ok, time for a blog. I haven’t done that in a long time, so I might be a little bit rusty. Please forgive me.

As many of you know, I’ve been having quite the problem with my health since the end of March. It started out with a misdiagnosis from St. Joseph’s (April 1^st), which turned into almost a week stay in Selby General 7 days later (April 8^th). While I was in the hospital, my doctor diagnosed me with a pulled rib because of a sharp pain right below my right shoulder blade. Needless to say the pain was so severe that three rounds of Demerol didn’t even work.

While I was trying to recover from my illness and rib injury I was on medical leave from work. When I finally got to go back to work one month later, I was still struggling with the pulled rib and my right arm going numb. I was only back to work for FOUR workdays before I was on the floor on a Wednesday night (May 6^th) when I picked up a coffee pot and my right arm went completely numb before sending what felt like a shock of electricity from the bottom of my right shoulder blade all the way down my arm. This prompted me to say that I needed to go to the ER, NOW! I handed over my book with the receipts for my customers and drove as far as I could, which was only about a mile before the pain/nausea was so bad I had to call Nate to come get me and take me the rest of the way to the ER.

When I got to the ER, I was diagnosed with Thoracic Myositis- which is an auto-immune disease. They came to this diagnosis without running any tests. At the time I had assumed they just looked back on all the tests ran the previous month while I was in the hospital. The ER doctor pointed out a website for me to get information about this disease. (I DO NOT IN ANYWAY believe in the practice by doctors, we pay them enough they should thoroughly explain EVERYTHING, not just hand you a paper with a website to scare you senseless!) I was told to use heat and take Naprosyn to ease the inflammation. I was written off of work (again!) until after Mother’s Day.

I got home and immediately searched up www.myositis.org and scared myself badly. Reading all of that information on my own just about sent me into a nervous breakdown. But after reading how most people get diagnosed, I started wondering if I was even diagnosed properly. But I was so stressed over the ordeal and in so much pain that I let it slide for about a week thinking I would go into remission from the disease. No such luck, but back to the time-line of this blog.

On May 7^th, I called Bob Evans and talked to a manager- who by the way is one of the best personable managers that store has seen in a while, and he informed me that I probably didn’t have a job any longer because of the new Zero Tolerance policy. Which I understand, but I had written documentation that I was at the ER immediately following my absence at Bob Evans, and a diagnosis, and a written work excuse. So this is where it starts to get muddled. I spent the entire day trying to get my job back, even though I would no longer be able to “lift over 0 pounds” indefinitely. I would’ve been happy being a hostess; anything to keep me at this job that I really did love so much. Alas, that just could not be the case. I was unceremoniously fired as of May 7^th, 2009. I’m still tossing around the idea of talking to a lawyer and the unemployment office, but I do not want to be the person that makes life at work harder for the remaining employees, including my husband. And I’m sure with how some things work at that store, my causing a stir would then in turn cause much trouble for all of those acquainted with me.

After moping at home for a few days, I started making phone calls as to what I could do about my situation, and I did find some help, thank goodness. But the pain was too much to bear even doing as little as I was. So on May 28^th, I went to Med Express as a last resort because I couldn’t get into see a doctor. They started a steroid treatment and told me they were as confused as I was about my diagnosis. They also referred me to Physical Therapy. I chose Mountain River Physical Therapy.

Nikki Arnold is my PT, and she has taken the time to explain everything to me, and even took some of her off time to research the disease that I was diagnosed with and some other possible conditions that it might be. She seemed to agree with a pulled rib diagnosis but with a greater underlining cause. We both assume that I have had some condition all my life which has caused all the migraines and weak joints.

When I finally found a PCP to take my case, the receptionist must not have passed the information about my diagnosis on to my doctor. How do I know this, you ask? Well because, my doctor doesn’t treat chronic pain or prescribe pain pills to help with my pain. Just my luck. He did order many lab tests and x-rays to see if we can find out what was going on, though.

I had to go to WVUP and take my placement tests for college while waiting for my lab appointment. On June 9^th, I took those tests, applied for college, and received my college schedule! My schedule is as follows:

M-Journalism/Photography 7:00-9:45 pm

T-Pre-College Writing 7:00-9:45pm

W-Art III/Drawing I 4:00-6:45

TBA-CS101-online class

I am so very excited to be having the opportunity to go back to school! Every dark cloud has a silver lining, being misdiagnosed, possibly again and again leading to the loss of my job turned into the furthering of my education and the possibility of finding the job of my dreams!

On June 10^th, I went to St. Joseph’s Outpatient Lab and Radiology to get these tests run. It was a very time consuming process, but I was more than happy to wait. I just kept thinking, maybe I’ll find out what is wrong with me! I was told after my blood work was finished that I could pick up the results the next day.

On June 11^th, I picked up said results and went to Job Rehabilitation to see about getting some more help going to school. After coming home, I searched up what the results meant. Essentially they meant I was just fine, with the exception of slightly high cholesterol. Well, for the tests that they ran anyway. The best thing is, I DO NOT have the factors for auto-immune diseases and I tested negative for the rheumatoid arthritis factor. But at the same time I felt relief by knowing I didn’t have these diseases, I went into panic mode. This means that I was misdiagnosed yet again, and I feel- no I KNOW- that there is something wrong with me- my right arm is immobile for goodness sake! I’m in severe pain all the time, my knees and hips are starting to give out, my back is always throbbing. I just want to sit, cry and hide in a dark hole somewhere and pretend none of this is happening! I have second guessed myself several times within the last 24 hours, almost convincing myself that it’s all in my head: I’m not feeling any pain in real life, but I’ve convinced myself, and then another shockwave of pain bursts through my body and I quickly change my mind again.

I guess I needed to get some of this off of my chest, but to anyone that reads this, thanks for taking the time to. I’m not always like this, I promise.

So, this is my first post here. So I thought I'd tell you about the family in a little detail.

I'm 23, and I will be 24 in 17 days. I'm young mother and wife who is (I'd like to think, anyway) mature beyond her years. I love to craft and sketch, draw, paint, etc. I also love curling up with a good book. And that good book is usually by Dean Koontz, Robin Cook, or Stephen King. I'm pretty addicted to the Internet, but have been leaving the laptop closed more often than not lately. I worry about money too often, and worry about getting unstressed not often enough. I'm a worrier by nature, I think its genetic. Family is the most important thing in the world to me. We'd be nowhere without the love of family and friends. My Momma is my best friend. I can tell her anything in the utmost confidence. I also have another best friend. Her name is Angie, and she's pretty much the most amazing best friend anyone can ask for!

Nate is 24 and he celebrates his birthday on November 6th. He is pretty quiet and shy, though I'm trying to get him to come out of his shell by any means possible. He loves us more than I ever thought possible, and we love him more! He is just a good ole' country boy who loves the outdoors. He also loves his game systems, and his TV. Speaking of TVs, we are getting a 65" rear projection flat screen TV in a couple weeks! He is one of the sweetest most unselfish people one could ever hope to meet. He is also the greatest Daddy on the face of this planet. Don't believe me? Just ask our daughter, Trinity!

Trinity is 5 and she celebrates her birthday on June 24th. She is the most gorgeous little girl in the whole wide world! She is also so smart! She is in kindergarten, and is in the advanced reader class. She is a sponge for any information she can get crammed into her head. She isn't the normal child. She'd rather have veggies over candy any day of the week. And she loves watching anything on the Animal Channel or Discovery Channel. She is a mother hen to any thing smaller than she is, whether it be an animal, plant, or child. Sometimes, she is a bit too helpful, though. It just makes us love her more. Nate or I couldn't imagine our lives without her. Well, we can't really remember life before her, either. She fills our day with joy, beauty, giggles, silliness, love, adoration, and a little exasperation. But we wouldn't have it any other way.

We also have a few pets. Ok, its more like a petting zoo. But we have right around 18 fish. Three tanks of cichlids(theres Crazy Ninja Fish, Sis, Sally, Big Momma Fish, Lone Wolf,and many more we haven't named), one tank of goldfish(Moby, Rainbow, Stripe, Spot, and Goldie), we have two plecos(Jericho and Kane), one Lionhead/Angora rabbit, Blue, two dogs, Laci and Rocky, and one cat, Mr. Winky. The pets make our small family a HUGE one!

Hope you've enjoyed a small peek into our family!